When you hear the word "frugal," what comes to mind?
Here's my list: avid couponer, bargain-hunter, garage-sale goer, master haggler. Someone who has learned to make do with less. Perhaps someone that can be creative in a pinch.
Do you think of something similar?
I have been reading Your Money or Your Life
Frugality means we are to enjoy what we have. If you have ten dresses but still feel you have nothing to wear, you are probably a spendthrift. But if you have ten dresses and have enjoyed wearing all of them for years, you are frugal. Waste lies not in the number of possessions but in the failure to enjoy them. Your success at being frugal is measured not by your penny-pinching but by your degree of enjoyment of the material world.
Now that sort of spun my thinking on its head, and I've been mulling over these statements for a few days now. And I think he's right. And I think there can be a great irony for couponers here.
Consider this. When I started couponing, I found myself snagging up as many freebies as I could. My stash soon began to overflow with toothpaste, shampoo, toilet paper, soup mixes, cereal, foot cream, eye cream, who-knows-what-its-for cream. Each week I was astounded at my savings. And yet…had I achieved true frugality?
Now for confession time. I have a bag of Garnier I mean to donate, but haven't yet. It's in my closet stealing precious floor space. Although I don't have allergies, I have five unopened boxes of allergy medicine that will expire within the year (that probably earned me some Register Rewards at Walgreens that have since been spent on other "useful" items). I have several kinds of salad dressing sitting in my pantry though I would prefer to nibble on fresh veggies anyday than prepare a salad. Would I have been more frugal if I would have paid full price for only items my family and I use? Granted, I can give these items away (which I most certainly will), but have I missed the overarching point of helping my family save money on the things we use?
A few paragraphs later, Dominguez offers that frugality is "the wise stewarding of money, time, energy, space and possessions." When I'm focused on one small deal (yes, even if it's a money-maker), it's possible I can miss the bigger picture of what it means to be frugal. So I can make $8 at Rite Aid this week. But what if I have no use for Zantac or ReNu MultiPlus solution? Again, I can donate it. But what about the hour spent finding the deal, clipping the coupons, going to the store, waiting in line, returning home, and submitting for my rebates? What about the space in my closet I'll have to make until I decide what to do with it? What about the time I'll spend figuring out where to donate these items, and the time and gas money I'll inevitably spend hauling it away? Is all of this worth $8? I can't make that judgment call for you, because I don't know your specific situation. But in mine, I think I could spend that time and effort more wisely.
Recently, I've shifted from feeling the need to snatch up every last deal to focusing on those that make sense for my family. Interestingly enough, my overall savings rate has gone down a bit. (I used to save 65% or more per month, now I'm hovering closer to 50%). However, my budget feels easier to manage because I'm not going to the stores multiple times each week. In short, I'm actually spending less. Without setting out to, I think I'm evolving into more and more of a frugal person.
My conclusion? It's not about getting every deal, every freebie, stockpiling years of shampoo and dish soap. It's about creating balance in all aspects of my life. I don't know that I can state it any more eloquently than Dominguez: "Frugality is…not too much, not too little, but just right. Nothing is wasted. Or left unused. It's a clean machine. Sleek. Perfect. Simple yet elegant. It's that magic word - enough."
Photo credit Michael Slonecker
{ 10 comments… read them below or add one }
Great thoughts! You’ve really made me stop and think.
Great article, Ang!!! I love the unexpected surprise of checking your blog for deals this morning, only to find myself checking my heart instead.
I love the last quote-not too much, not too little, just right. Makes me think about God’s design for our planet-He made it pefectly sustainable, but we’ve created the excess junk! Wait, does that mean that God is frugal?!!? Alrighty, that’s a whole different topic so I’ll end now. Thanks for your thoughts.
The flip side to this (that I didn’t delve into) is that potentially a person who spends good money on quality things could also be considered frugal provided he/she enjoys and uses all those things. So someone that spends $100 on a nice sweater and wears it often could be conisdered more frugal than someone who buys 10 for $100 and never wears them. Interesting thought, huh?
Nice! Thank you for this, I’ve been stressed about missing out on deals and I stay home instead but feel “guilty” that I didn’t go for it anyway! Silly right?? Thanks for the permisssion to sit back and think. You don’t HAVE to do every deal. Especially when you have no room in your freezer/fridge/cupboards anyway!
That was EXACTLY what I needed to read today. Thanks.
I think it is so easy to stress about getting every deal. But doesn’t that defeat the purpose of trying to achieve a better balanced life? Life is to be enjoyed, not wasted stressing over a missed Walgreens Register Reward! LOL!
Thanks all for your comments.
This was a great article…you really hit the nail on the head! Thanks for sharing.
I am new to your blog and enjoying it so far. Come by and visit me sometime.
I just wanted to say thanks for posting this– not many of the deals blogs have articles like this one. Your thoughts are exactly the thoughts I have been having recently. Couponing is something to be done in moderation, otherwise at the end of the day, you can realize that in running after all the deals, you have missed out on greater opportunities in this life– like being the wife and mother I am suppose to be. Hard-core couponing brings out some parts of me I don’t like– how I am excessively crazed about saving every dollar when I am doing my deals, how I am so “focused” when I am doing my deal runs (so much so that I glaze over other opportunities, like talking with an older lady who stops to admire my kids– how much it would make her day to chat a few minutes with her! But NOOOO, I’ve gotta do my deals before someone else in the stores gets them before me!!) I don’t like going into stores and everyone knows me as the couponer. I also don’t like the tons of stuff that just lingers around our home that we don’t need. I have always thought of myself as environmentally conscious (recycling and all), but am I really when I have bought enough plastic and cardboard-packaged stuff to fill a dumspter? Well, I am really rethinking my role in the coupon world. Where is the middle ground– and what is it all worth? Thanks for sharing what’s on your mind.
As someone who started life as one of the “pay more, keep it forever” people (with a closetful of 10-16 year old “expensive” sweaters), and who has now morphed into the “couponing, bargin hunting” type – I LOVED THIS POST! I think you can do both. My goal is to find good deals on quality stuff (i.e. right now I’m wearing a classic L.L. Bean wool sweater that I got on sale and has lasted for years). I love being able to save money at the grocery, but I had to curb my beginners coupon enthusiasm and bring it back to a down-to-earth-I’d-buy-it-anyway reality. If I kept my grocery list the same, but found coupons for those items, then I was saving money. If I had coupons for items I wouldn’t buy normally, then I wasn’t saving anything. [SIGH] I know there is middle ground, but I’m just arriving and it has been a long trip.
Thanks for helping me know I’m not alone!
I always think of the way folks Used to live.
When my mom was growing up she had two or three dresses she wore to school and one for Sunday. That was it.
It wasn’t because they were poor; it was because not so long ago we didn’t all have the urge to consume (and I’m including myself here, believe me).
I was very close to my Grandparents and my Great Aunt and Uncle. They had lived through the depression and both World Wars, so it simply wasn’t in their nature to waste. You didn’t pour more cereal than you were going to eat; you didn’t shop because you were bored. At the same time, they were very generous people, and they never hesitated to buy something lovely and useful. They just didn’t buy things simply to buy them or because they were a bargain.
They were frugal, but they lived rich lives.